It's been much more of the same. Friday he followed me to work. On the interstate honking the horn and yelling. I thought he was gone by the time I was at the gas station but as I started to get my coffee I felt him before I looked up to see him standing next to me. He started screaming at me getting the attention of everyone in the gas station. He flat out said I could keep calling the police, it'd make no difference to him because sooner or later he will get me. When a bystander asked him what the fuck he was doing "crazy" replied it was none of his fucking business. Needless to say crazy ran out of there after that because it was more than obvious that "bystander" was going to kill him. He took off and 20 NON speedy minutes later the cops came. Thirty minutes after I called 911 on the interstate and called the twice to update my whereabouts. I'm considering telling 911 I need fire and rescue next time instead of police because I KNOW they don't take their sweet ass time.
Luckily for me Mr. Bystander stayed and gave the police the story as well. He did get a bit off track and start yelling at the police about how I'm gonna be on the show 48 hours dead because this guy has stalked me for months and nobody did shit about it. Sadly...the police didn't disagree much. So that made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
Friday night and Saturday he called repeatedly from a blocked number, and I've had a few run ins with him since, he screams at me at stoplights...swerves at me in traffic, waits in plain sight outside the store or drives by a dozen times as I wait to pick my kids up from school.
A couple of people have mentioned it's entirely possible that my phone is bugged, and after doing some research and finding out that someone can do this simply by paying a few bucks and entering your phone number on 1 of a hundred websites that offer this..... it's starting to make sense. My next big purchase is a new phone and phone number switch. Again.
Trying to explain to someone who doesn't know the story or hasn't been through something like this is beyond difficult. I get so many "well why can't you......" fill in the blanks with everything you're thinking. I DO everything I can. I document. I call the police. I file reports. I call and talk to the ADA numerous times a week. I've left messages for her begging to put the warrants through and NOT take his plea deal. It makes me sick that I'm the victim here and the burden of proof is on me yet he has to do NOTHING to disprove his actions.
I can't express how insanely tired I am. This isn't a hard days work or I didn't sleep well last night kind of tired. This is the tired I didn't know existed until now.
Everyday it's something with him. Everyday instead of being completely focused on my kids, my job, my own life, his bullshit distracts me. I can't focus. I can't sleep because I lay awake at night sad and pissed about not focusing on what I should. I lay awake at night in fear sometimes too. Not only fear of him and what he's truly capable of but also fear that if he doesn't stop this my ex husband was 100 % right in saying the kids should just stay with him until this is all resolved. I fear that most of all. I'm crying as I say that because my babies...the only real true loves of my life. My stupidity in getting involved with this psycho could cost me them.
I do a lot of things in fear. I can't wait for the day I don't. I can't wait to not have tears waiting to brim my eyes if someone looks at me wrong. I can't wait for the day I don't jump out of my skin every time I hear a noise louder than a pin drop.
At one point I thought I was getting there....I had someone beside me and I felt like I wasn't alone, there for me and my kids but like I said before that went to hell in a handbasket so here I sit. I'm in NO way saying my friends and family aren't caring, supportive and insanely worried...but I am saying it's not the same.
I know that not much of this makes sense. These feelings are all just coming out whenever, and however. To the people I love that are reading this: please PLEASE know I love you and I know I've been a wreck lately. Being mean when it's unnecessary, crying when there's no reason to..all that. I'm sorry and thank you for still loving me.
J
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Well...here we are again. Almost every day I think to myself for some reason that I miss this blog thing. I missed being able to say what I needed and wanted. It's been a pretty rough few months and when I needed someone to talk to I'd spurt random parts of what's going on to people....but really never went into every single thing like I would if I were telling the blog.
I'll try to fill you all in as best as I can because really...some shit slips my mind some days, and other weeks and months all sort of blend together.
The first week of July the guy I'd been with for a bit over a year went to jail for assualt. We had a pretty big fight and it turned bad. Since that day I've not spoken to him. That makes no difference to him though. I have a protection order against him for myself and my kids. He just keeps going. He's always wherever I am. In parking lots...at gas stations...on the interstate...really he's everywhere. He's approached me multiple times. His reactions vary sometimes he's sobbing, sometimes he's screaming at me. But sometimes he screams in tongues and punches himself in the head. He's egged (yes eggs) my sisters car at my house...he put dog crap all over a guys car that was parked here....he drove TO my work and egged my car. We have that on video. He walked into the sales dept at my job and asked to use a phone to call HIMSELF so he could tell his attorney I tried to call him from work. Too bad for him our tech dept keeps all phone records, then we have that surveillance thing and 6 witnesses. He leaves flowers on my driveway...sends me flowers and cards at work. Calls me at work telling me I'm a stupid bitch and I'll pay for this. Hundreds and HUNDREDS of text messages...voicemails...blocked calls at 2 am...God...I could go on and on but if you don't get the picture by now you're just not gonna.
Yesterday I pulled out of the garage to find roses (just the heads of them) on my sidewalk along with a pot of mums. I swiftly placed them in the garbage can at the end of the drive because luckily it was trash day.
After school the trash still hadn't been picked up and my daughter was here when I left for the store. She watched as I pulled out and he came up behind me yelling and laughing. I left like nothing was happening. A few minutes later my daughter called me yelling that he'd picked up the ENTIRE trash can full of trash with the flowers atop and he TOOK it.
The crazy son of a bitch stole my trash can. Like..who does that !?! Oh right...a psycho does.
Calling in that police report was interesting because if you don't explain the whole situation and you tell the operator that some crazy just took your trash can full of trash it sounds retarded. Well, it is retarded any way you look at it honestly.
The only good thing was he unknowingly committed 2 crimes. He stole my property, and he violated his protection order because my kid was standing right there in the door as he came on my property.
This is the 7th violation of protection, but if you ask his attorney it's only because I still love him and I can't bring myself to admit it, so he's just trying to help.
We go back to court soon and he was supposed to get probation with quite a few additional requirements. One of which is a full psych evalaution by the county. As in...he has to be admitted for this. Can't wait for that day because they won't let his crazy ass out after they evaluate him.
What I find extremely amusing is the DA and police...they say "don't let him run your life, go on about your life as usual." Right. Go on as usual .....come out of Target, Walmart, the grocery store, your best friends house, a restaraunt.....and there he is but act normal cause he won't approach you and start yelling he's gonna put a bullet in his head next time he sees you so you have to live with that guilt. But be cool cause he can't run your life.
Now I'm gonna admit that when he said that....I did sorta beg him to just do it so I could load my groceries. I've also accidentally hit the gas in the car as he sauntered slowly in front of me taunting me....
I have nightmares that he climbs on my roof and is standing at the end of my bed. I have them a lot. I can feel when he's outside waiting for me to leave for work, or when I'm walking to my car out of a store. I know he's there. Every time. This guy that owns his business and used to work dawn til dusk and beyond has turned the reigns over to someone else and made me his full time job. The cops can't do shit because everywhere I go is a public place and he can shop or drive wherever he'd like. It's all just strange coincidence that he's where I am at the same time as I am. Every day.
So...that's the shortest run down I can come up with there.
Besides that. I've been working at uhmm my place of work since August. I was extremely lucky to find this job...and I like to think they were lucky to find me too :) but I am a bit delusional these days so they probably think differently. The people I work with for the most part are great and the pay is too.
Had my heart broken my another since that July thing and it was so hard because I knew him...but once again my own stupidity got me into that. Too bad my own stupidity can't make me feel better. Ah well....it will soon cause I kinda dig living in bliss and ignorance. That's essentially all I'm going to say about that situation right now because it makes me cry to talk about, think about, wonder about.
I'll try to fill you all in as best as I can because really...some shit slips my mind some days, and other weeks and months all sort of blend together.
The first week of July the guy I'd been with for a bit over a year went to jail for assualt. We had a pretty big fight and it turned bad. Since that day I've not spoken to him. That makes no difference to him though. I have a protection order against him for myself and my kids. He just keeps going. He's always wherever I am. In parking lots...at gas stations...on the interstate...really he's everywhere. He's approached me multiple times. His reactions vary sometimes he's sobbing, sometimes he's screaming at me. But sometimes he screams in tongues and punches himself in the head. He's egged (yes eggs) my sisters car at my house...he put dog crap all over a guys car that was parked here....he drove TO my work and egged my car. We have that on video. He walked into the sales dept at my job and asked to use a phone to call HIMSELF so he could tell his attorney I tried to call him from work. Too bad for him our tech dept keeps all phone records, then we have that surveillance thing and 6 witnesses. He leaves flowers on my driveway...sends me flowers and cards at work. Calls me at work telling me I'm a stupid bitch and I'll pay for this. Hundreds and HUNDREDS of text messages...voicemails...blocked calls at 2 am...God...I could go on and on but if you don't get the picture by now you're just not gonna.
Yesterday I pulled out of the garage to find roses (just the heads of them) on my sidewalk along with a pot of mums. I swiftly placed them in the garbage can at the end of the drive because luckily it was trash day.
After school the trash still hadn't been picked up and my daughter was here when I left for the store. She watched as I pulled out and he came up behind me yelling and laughing. I left like nothing was happening. A few minutes later my daughter called me yelling that he'd picked up the ENTIRE trash can full of trash with the flowers atop and he TOOK it.
The crazy son of a bitch stole my trash can. Like..who does that !?! Oh right...a psycho does.
Calling in that police report was interesting because if you don't explain the whole situation and you tell the operator that some crazy just took your trash can full of trash it sounds retarded. Well, it is retarded any way you look at it honestly.
The only good thing was he unknowingly committed 2 crimes. He stole my property, and he violated his protection order because my kid was standing right there in the door as he came on my property.
This is the 7th violation of protection, but if you ask his attorney it's only because I still love him and I can't bring myself to admit it, so he's just trying to help.
We go back to court soon and he was supposed to get probation with quite a few additional requirements. One of which is a full psych evalaution by the county. As in...he has to be admitted for this. Can't wait for that day because they won't let his crazy ass out after they evaluate him.
What I find extremely amusing is the DA and police...they say "don't let him run your life, go on about your life as usual." Right. Go on as usual .....come out of Target, Walmart, the grocery store, your best friends house, a restaraunt.....and there he is but act normal cause he won't approach you and start yelling he's gonna put a bullet in his head next time he sees you so you have to live with that guilt. But be cool cause he can't run your life.
Now I'm gonna admit that when he said that....I did sorta beg him to just do it so I could load my groceries. I've also accidentally hit the gas in the car as he sauntered slowly in front of me taunting me....
I have nightmares that he climbs on my roof and is standing at the end of my bed. I have them a lot. I can feel when he's outside waiting for me to leave for work, or when I'm walking to my car out of a store. I know he's there. Every time. This guy that owns his business and used to work dawn til dusk and beyond has turned the reigns over to someone else and made me his full time job. The cops can't do shit because everywhere I go is a public place and he can shop or drive wherever he'd like. It's all just strange coincidence that he's where I am at the same time as I am. Every day.
So...that's the shortest run down I can come up with there.
Besides that. I've been working at uhmm my place of work since August. I was extremely lucky to find this job...and I like to think they were lucky to find me too :) but I am a bit delusional these days so they probably think differently. The people I work with for the most part are great and the pay is too.
Had my heart broken my another since that July thing and it was so hard because I knew him...but once again my own stupidity got me into that. Too bad my own stupidity can't make me feel better. Ah well....it will soon cause I kinda dig living in bliss and ignorance. That's essentially all I'm going to say about that situation right now because it makes me cry to talk about, think about, wonder about.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Sunday, December 23, 2007
December 23
Ah to be a kid again
It would be grand. Christmas would still have magic and suspense.
Hearing the Nativity Story would be anticipated instead of wondering what time we could be done by. You'd ask all kinds of questions, now though you dread having to explain why Mary and Joseph named him Jesus and not Jim or Square.....
Making cookies for Santa is about nothing but fun and making a mess rather than trying to clean as you go to lighten the cleaning load for afterwards.
Presents were meant to be squished and shook and felt with our eyes closed to try and envision what lies within, now though the squishing and shaking and feeling up of the gifts gives me a heart attack and makes me want to scream about possibly ripping the paper and me having to wrap them again.
As a child you never looked under the tree and though " damn what if I don't like anything that's there ?" As a parent I worry that even though they said they wanted it, that they have changed their minds and now think they are beyond that.
The past few days have been stressful because of those few things I just mentioned. I suppose it's my own selfishness that has taken over, what a shitty time to be selfish I know. I just miss that "magic and elation" that used to accompany these days preceding.
After much self reflection though, it is back. I look at my girls and wonder why in the hell it ever left me. They are my miracles and they are my love and magic and elation.
I got lost but now I am back on track. I don't give a shit if I have to wrap all the gifts 10 times, it was worth it to see Mimi get stuck under the tree getting to them. We can make cookies a dozen more times, the flour on their faces and sprinkles stuck to the end of their noses shows that it meant more to them than just making a mess. I will explain over and over to Didda that even if "Jim" and "Square" are fine names, his name is Jesus, and no she cannot call him Jim.
I hope that all of you are filled with your own magic and are able experience your own miracles this Christmas .......
Ah to be a kid again
It would be grand. Christmas would still have magic and suspense.
Hearing the Nativity Story would be anticipated instead of wondering what time we could be done by. You'd ask all kinds of questions, now though you dread having to explain why Mary and Joseph named him Jesus and not Jim or Square.....
Making cookies for Santa is about nothing but fun and making a mess rather than trying to clean as you go to lighten the cleaning load for afterwards.
Presents were meant to be squished and shook and felt with our eyes closed to try and envision what lies within, now though the squishing and shaking and feeling up of the gifts gives me a heart attack and makes me want to scream about possibly ripping the paper and me having to wrap them again.
As a child you never looked under the tree and though " damn what if I don't like anything that's there ?" As a parent I worry that even though they said they wanted it, that they have changed their minds and now think they are beyond that.
The past few days have been stressful because of those few things I just mentioned. I suppose it's my own selfishness that has taken over, what a shitty time to be selfish I know. I just miss that "magic and elation" that used to accompany these days preceding.
After much self reflection though, it is back. I look at my girls and wonder why in the hell it ever left me. They are my miracles and they are my love and magic and elation.
I got lost but now I am back on track. I don't give a shit if I have to wrap all the gifts 10 times, it was worth it to see Mimi get stuck under the tree getting to them. We can make cookies a dozen more times, the flour on their faces and sprinkles stuck to the end of their noses shows that it meant more to them than just making a mess. I will explain over and over to Didda that even if "Jim" and "Square" are fine names, his name is Jesus, and no she cannot call him Jim.
I hope that all of you are filled with your own magic and are able experience your own miracles this Christmas .......
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
December 18
And the beat goes on and on....
Can you seriously believe that there are only 7 damn days until Christmas ?!?! Oy ! Wait...that was a Jewish term and Hanukah is...nevermind.... you know what I mean.
The weather has been less than pleasant around these parts...I know I have stated this a million times but I HATE winter, what I hate more is the viruses that run rampant through our house during this time. But when it's too cold to go anywhere there is not much to do but share germs and bitch about it I suppose.
The girls are all very excited to the point of madness about next week, but yet for some reason Didda is more concerned about what we are doing for the 4th of July. She's let me know that we will be having a party and she will hold her baby brother for me when I decorate for it, and she is worried that Aunt Tawny might miss the fireworks. I even had to call Tawny and then reassure Didda that they will be here. She's started to ease off that subject, and is going back into " I want everything from Santa" mode.
In other news ...remember the neighbor lady that was the "constant lawn mower " ? Like 7 a.m. mowing and psychotic about the leaves and blah blah ? Anyway, I got a text from the ex-wife of the guy whose girlfriend that is that she died suddenly last week.
Oddly enough hubs and I and Darby (across the street) had only minutes before been saying that it was odd that they hadn't picked the leaves off their lawn....very odd for her. She died of a cancer that she had suffered from before and although she knew it was highly likely that it would come back, she neglected to go back for follow up appointments.
She went to the hospital on Tuesday complaining of severe stomach pain, got a CT scan that showed it had spread through her entire body, and her obituary was in the paper Thursday.
Not only that....the next night I walked into the bathroom where our blinds were up, I didn't turn the light on because I was just grabbing a tissue. I happened to see out of the corner of my eye that their dining room light was on. (It's easy to see because the back of our house faces the side of theirs the windows are pretty much adjacent.) I look over and see a woman standing in front of the window and as I try to not piss myself because I just saw a ghost....the guy walks in the dining room and wraps his arms around the ghost from behind and starts to kiss her neck. This was no ghost...this was a new woman already ! I still about pissed myself ! Two seconds later a little girl about Diddas age ran through the room...it was only then I was sure it wasn't a ghost because the other one had two older boys. So yeah I spied for a second I admit and not even shamefully.
Shame on him really. I mean damn, the body wasn't even cold yet ! I know it's obvious that he and this new one had a thing before all of this, it just seems so disrespectful to me though. So the new one has been over every night this week, she even came by while he was at work to let the dog out and check the mail.
I bet that he thinks that everyone in the neighborhood thinks that he and old one broke up since she just up and disappeared though, forgetting that I have a line to gossip to and from just about anywhere in the world.
Oh I never said it was good to gossip but, damn if the gossip is good just tell me and I'll spread the word for you ;)
And the beat goes on and on....
Can you seriously believe that there are only 7 damn days until Christmas ?!?! Oy ! Wait...that was a Jewish term and Hanukah is...nevermind.... you know what I mean.
The weather has been less than pleasant around these parts...I know I have stated this a million times but I HATE winter, what I hate more is the viruses that run rampant through our house during this time. But when it's too cold to go anywhere there is not much to do but share germs and bitch about it I suppose.
The girls are all very excited to the point of madness about next week, but yet for some reason Didda is more concerned about what we are doing for the 4th of July. She's let me know that we will be having a party and she will hold her baby brother for me when I decorate for it, and she is worried that Aunt Tawny might miss the fireworks. I even had to call Tawny and then reassure Didda that they will be here. She's started to ease off that subject, and is going back into " I want everything from Santa" mode.
In other news ...remember the neighbor lady that was the "constant lawn mower " ? Like 7 a.m. mowing and psychotic about the leaves and blah blah ? Anyway, I got a text from the ex-wife of the guy whose girlfriend that is that she died suddenly last week.
Oddly enough hubs and I and Darby (across the street) had only minutes before been saying that it was odd that they hadn't picked the leaves off their lawn....very odd for her. She died of a cancer that she had suffered from before and although she knew it was highly likely that it would come back, she neglected to go back for follow up appointments.
She went to the hospital on Tuesday complaining of severe stomach pain, got a CT scan that showed it had spread through her entire body, and her obituary was in the paper Thursday.
Not only that....the next night I walked into the bathroom where our blinds were up, I didn't turn the light on because I was just grabbing a tissue. I happened to see out of the corner of my eye that their dining room light was on. (It's easy to see because the back of our house faces the side of theirs the windows are pretty much adjacent.) I look over and see a woman standing in front of the window and as I try to not piss myself because I just saw a ghost....the guy walks in the dining room and wraps his arms around the ghost from behind and starts to kiss her neck. This was no ghost...this was a new woman already ! I still about pissed myself ! Two seconds later a little girl about Diddas age ran through the room...it was only then I was sure it wasn't a ghost because the other one had two older boys. So yeah I spied for a second I admit and not even shamefully.
Shame on him really. I mean damn, the body wasn't even cold yet ! I know it's obvious that he and this new one had a thing before all of this, it just seems so disrespectful to me though. So the new one has been over every night this week, she even came by while he was at work to let the dog out and check the mail.
I bet that he thinks that everyone in the neighborhood thinks that he and old one broke up since she just up and disappeared though, forgetting that I have a line to gossip to and from just about anywhere in the world.
Oh I never said it was good to gossip but, damn if the gossip is good just tell me and I'll spread the word for you ;)
Monday, December 10, 2007
December 09
FYI #1
For awhile now people have been asking me questions about pregnancy, and parenting. While they've asked about being a rockstar too, I've decided to keep that part to myself. But after fielding so many questions I decided to keep some of them in my head and then I asked some close friends of mine what they really want to know. The following is going to be part 1 of what I hope is many "parts". Now please remember that my advice and knowledge although superior to most *snort* is not a substitute for medical advice and if you have an emergency don't email me, call 9-1-1.
These very first questions come from my good buddy Lulu.
Why don't more women feed from the boob, seein' how it's cheaper and all ??
I can only give my personal opinion on this one. I have heard that it can be such a fabulous bonding experience and all that jazz. The thing is, the only thing I have ever experienced from someone doing anything with my boobs is
A: Conception
and
B: Nothing that makes me think of feeding anyone or thing from my boob.
It's just not my thing and I cannot bring myself to do it. Plain and simple. For those who do it good for you, and for those who don't for whatever reason, it's ok. I can assure you that your baby will not be stupid because it didn't get to suck you dry. I have 3 kids with test scores to prove that. That could be because I taught them how to cheat early on, but I'm going to just go with how smart they are.
WTF is "tummy time"?
Tummy time. It's a great thing for babies to have from day 1. Personally I no longer let my kids sleep that way until much later after they can turn over both ways. But it is essential. Not only does it help them gain strength in their necks. It helps with brain development. Seriously I read that in a book.
When is the soonest a baby can have stuff like juice? Well we wait until around 5 months, but if they have a poo-poo issue, you can try to force down some prune juice. Try is the key word there. Prune juice is disgusting and even if they do drink formula all day babies know when something flat out tastes like shit
Cloth Diapers?
Uhm no.
I have enough laundry to do, and scraping poop out of a diaper and pre-treating it and putting dozens of things that were only minutes ago full of shit in my washer makes me gag. Poop spreads diseases. E.coli first of all and the less time I spend with my hands near it the better.
WTF is a mucus plug?
Ok so let's use our imaginations for a moment here. A uterus (where the baby is holed up for 40 weeks) is like a balloon. Bigger and rounder at the top and smaller and thicker at the bottom. Tying off the "balloon" is the cervix. The cervix stays closed as tight as possible until the end of pregnancy. But there is still a thin opening from the bottom to the top. Sort of like sinuses when we have allergies, to keep out all pollutants, ie: bacteria, sperm, rodents, the cervix builds up mucous. At the end of pregnancy when the cervix start to dilate (open) the mucous starts to make it's way out. It used to be thought that "losing your plug" meant that you'd be in the delivery room within hours, once again I have 5 kids to prove that is not always true. One book I read said it meant "labor is imminent". Well...no shit ?
Do you really poop yourself during labor ?
Honestly, sometimes yes. When there is a baby coming our of the same area used by your intestines it is sometimes unavoidable. The intestines have to move, and before that they have to be empty.It used to be protocol to do enemas before labor I hear. But it's not usually necessary and really when you have your va-jay-jay stretched to the point of no return shitting yourself is so not on your "things I care about right now" list.
Is the pain really THAT BAD ?
Short answer yes. When people say you forget how bad it was you do in a way. I mean you remember thinking that this is torture and you can't believe you think anything in the world is worth this. Then if you have another the pain returns and you seriously consider admitting yourself to the psyche ward because this infliction of pain on yourself is just not healthy, and you probably need help and/or alcohol.
Pain med's or no ?
Hey, if you wanna be all Billy Badass and think you don't "need" them be my guest. I choose not to because
A: I have hurt in places that don't even have names for months now and I need a fucking break.
B: The baby is going to come out plain and simple. Whether you have pain relief or not, it will still come out.
C: I want to be able to see my baby after he/she is born and not be still screaming from pain.
I do have to tell you though that after 4 epidurals I have had only two that worked. The epi looks scary and if it doesn't work it sucks ass, but if/when it does it is so worth it. I have offered to marry the anesthesiologist after I got a good epidural.
Well, that's going to be it for today. I'm freezing my balls off down here in the family room and my nose is starting to run. I'm gonna go turn the heat up !
FYI #1
For awhile now people have been asking me questions about pregnancy, and parenting. While they've asked about being a rockstar too, I've decided to keep that part to myself. But after fielding so many questions I decided to keep some of them in my head and then I asked some close friends of mine what they really want to know. The following is going to be part 1 of what I hope is many "parts". Now please remember that my advice and knowledge although superior to most *snort* is not a substitute for medical advice and if you have an emergency don't email me, call 9-1-1.
These very first questions come from my good buddy Lulu.
Why don't more women feed from the boob, seein' how it's cheaper and all ??
I can only give my personal opinion on this one. I have heard that it can be such a fabulous bonding experience and all that jazz. The thing is, the only thing I have ever experienced from someone doing anything with my boobs is
A: Conception
and
B: Nothing that makes me think of feeding anyone or thing from my boob.
It's just not my thing and I cannot bring myself to do it. Plain and simple. For those who do it good for you, and for those who don't for whatever reason, it's ok. I can assure you that your baby will not be stupid because it didn't get to suck you dry. I have 3 kids with test scores to prove that. That could be because I taught them how to cheat early on, but I'm going to just go with how smart they are.
WTF is "tummy time"?
Tummy time. It's a great thing for babies to have from day 1. Personally I no longer let my kids sleep that way until much later after they can turn over both ways. But it is essential. Not only does it help them gain strength in their necks. It helps with brain development. Seriously I read that in a book.
When is the soonest a baby can have stuff like juice? Well we wait until around 5 months, but if they have a poo-poo issue, you can try to force down some prune juice. Try is the key word there. Prune juice is disgusting and even if they do drink formula all day babies know when something flat out tastes like shit
Cloth Diapers?
Uhm no.
I have enough laundry to do, and scraping poop out of a diaper and pre-treating it and putting dozens of things that were only minutes ago full of shit in my washer makes me gag. Poop spreads diseases. E.coli first of all and the less time I spend with my hands near it the better.
WTF is a mucus plug?
Ok so let's use our imaginations for a moment here. A uterus (where the baby is holed up for 40 weeks) is like a balloon. Bigger and rounder at the top and smaller and thicker at the bottom. Tying off the "balloon" is the cervix. The cervix stays closed as tight as possible until the end of pregnancy. But there is still a thin opening from the bottom to the top. Sort of like sinuses when we have allergies, to keep out all pollutants, ie: bacteria, sperm, rodents, the cervix builds up mucous. At the end of pregnancy when the cervix start to dilate (open) the mucous starts to make it's way out. It used to be thought that "losing your plug" meant that you'd be in the delivery room within hours, once again I have 5 kids to prove that is not always true. One book I read said it meant "labor is imminent". Well...no shit ?
Do you really poop yourself during labor ?
Honestly, sometimes yes. When there is a baby coming our of the same area used by your intestines it is sometimes unavoidable. The intestines have to move, and before that they have to be empty.It used to be protocol to do enemas before labor I hear. But it's not usually necessary and really when you have your va-jay-jay stretched to the point of no return shitting yourself is so not on your "things I care about right now" list.
Is the pain really THAT BAD ?
Short answer yes. When people say you forget how bad it was you do in a way. I mean you remember thinking that this is torture and you can't believe you think anything in the world is worth this. Then if you have another the pain returns and you seriously consider admitting yourself to the psyche ward because this infliction of pain on yourself is just not healthy, and you probably need help and/or alcohol.
Pain med's or no ?
Hey, if you wanna be all Billy Badass and think you don't "need" them be my guest. I choose not to because
A: I have hurt in places that don't even have names for months now and I need a fucking break.
B: The baby is going to come out plain and simple. Whether you have pain relief or not, it will still come out.
C: I want to be able to see my baby after he/she is born and not be still screaming from pain.
I do have to tell you though that after 4 epidurals I have had only two that worked. The epi looks scary and if it doesn't work it sucks ass, but if/when it does it is so worth it. I have offered to marry the anesthesiologist after I got a good epidural.
Well, that's going to be it for today. I'm freezing my balls off down here in the family room and my nose is starting to run. I'm gonna go turn the heat up !
Friday, December 07, 2007
December 07
Friday
Bana : Jam, what is a virgin ?
Jam: Someone from Virginia I think...?
I just left that whole mess alone, which I know was probably a mistake as Banas will probably put that answer on a test sometime in the future.
I am done with my Christmas shopping finally, that was a mess all in itself. I'm glad it's over and I've only got about 4 things left to wrap, go me ! Everything would be wrapped already but after re-wrapping 5 things I got tired of doing it. MiMi thinks I wrap presents and put them under the tree to tempt her and nothing else. She's almost a year and has already picked up on how to be sneaky and not touch a damn thing until you leave the room. You walk back in and there she is hand full of paper and instead of acting like she's been naughty she puts the paper in front of her face and drops it to say "boo !" and smile. She's lucky she's cute is all I have to say.
Today is Poppy's 8th birthday and she chose to have me bake a cake instead of a store bought one, and her dinner choice is tacos. It all sounds good to me though ! Tacos and cake are both things that will have me up at around midnight throwing up, but there isn't a lot left that doesn't and at least it'll taste good the first time !
*Sigh* Ok so I'm off to the store for lettuce and tomato's, how in the hell can I shop for tacos and forget that shit !?!? Oh, I did remember to get toilet paper though, we have about 90 rolls now. I dunno.
Friday
Bana : Jam, what is a virgin ?
Jam: Someone from Virginia I think...?
I just left that whole mess alone, which I know was probably a mistake as Banas will probably put that answer on a test sometime in the future.
I am done with my Christmas shopping finally, that was a mess all in itself. I'm glad it's over and I've only got about 4 things left to wrap, go me ! Everything would be wrapped already but after re-wrapping 5 things I got tired of doing it. MiMi thinks I wrap presents and put them under the tree to tempt her and nothing else. She's almost a year and has already picked up on how to be sneaky and not touch a damn thing until you leave the room. You walk back in and there she is hand full of paper and instead of acting like she's been naughty she puts the paper in front of her face and drops it to say "boo !" and smile. She's lucky she's cute is all I have to say.
Today is Poppy's 8th birthday and she chose to have me bake a cake instead of a store bought one, and her dinner choice is tacos. It all sounds good to me though ! Tacos and cake are both things that will have me up at around midnight throwing up, but there isn't a lot left that doesn't and at least it'll taste good the first time !
*Sigh* Ok so I'm off to the store for lettuce and tomato's, how in the hell can I shop for tacos and forget that shit !?!? Oh, I did remember to get toilet paper though, we have about 90 rolls now. I dunno.
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
December 05
Thank God for Cheeseburgers
I'm sure most of you have heard by now of the tragedy at one of our malls here in Omaha. Many of you have sent me emails and text messages asking if we are ok and yes we are. Thank you for asking and caring.
We are ok because of a cheeseburger.
We had plans to head out to that mall today ,that is further away than our normal one, to do some Christmas "wishing". It was about 10:40 a.m. and we were coming back from dropping my work off. Didda had been in rare form all morning, (that I should just call normal form from now on). She started throwing a fit about having a McDonalds cheeseburger for lunch, and no matter what else I offered her instead it was no good even if it was at the food court, she could give a shit less. And, the fact that it wasn't even 11 a.m. yet made less of a difference in her mind.
Knowing that after she had a breakdown about such a minor thing I knew that we were not going anywhere today so we went to McDonalds and came home.
My phone started beeping and ringing shortly after it broke on the news, and the second person was my sister who I assumed was calling to ask about our status. Actually, she was calling to ask if I'd seen their local news and what had happened there. She was asking because she and her best friend were working alone in the bank this morning and were robbed.
Here I was all full of relief because we were ok and had stayed away from danger today and my baby sister was face to face with a man with a gun. The realization of that hit me harder than our own aversion of mayhem.
What's odd in itself is, my sister had called me last night saying that she was very stressed. Her mind was racing and she couldn't calm herself down no matter what. She was in the beginning stages of a panic attack for no apparent reason. The reason, I see now was premonition.
Today, although not "Thanksgiving" I am saying thanks for the fact that we are all safe and sound. I am also sending my heartfelt thoughts and prayers to the families that are grieving for their loved ones that were lost today in this tragedy.
Thank God for Cheeseburgers
I'm sure most of you have heard by now of the tragedy at one of our malls here in Omaha. Many of you have sent me emails and text messages asking if we are ok and yes we are. Thank you for asking and caring.
We are ok because of a cheeseburger.
We had plans to head out to that mall today ,that is further away than our normal one, to do some Christmas "wishing". It was about 10:40 a.m. and we were coming back from dropping my work off. Didda had been in rare form all morning, (that I should just call normal form from now on). She started throwing a fit about having a McDonalds cheeseburger for lunch, and no matter what else I offered her instead it was no good even if it was at the food court, she could give a shit less. And, the fact that it wasn't even 11 a.m. yet made less of a difference in her mind.
Knowing that after she had a breakdown about such a minor thing I knew that we were not going anywhere today so we went to McDonalds and came home.
My phone started beeping and ringing shortly after it broke on the news, and the second person was my sister who I assumed was calling to ask about our status. Actually, she was calling to ask if I'd seen their local news and what had happened there. She was asking because she and her best friend were working alone in the bank this morning and were robbed.
Here I was all full of relief because we were ok and had stayed away from danger today and my baby sister was face to face with a man with a gun. The realization of that hit me harder than our own aversion of mayhem.
What's odd in itself is, my sister had called me last night saying that she was very stressed. Her mind was racing and she couldn't calm herself down no matter what. She was in the beginning stages of a panic attack for no apparent reason. The reason, I see now was premonition.
Today, although not "Thanksgiving" I am saying thanks for the fact that we are all safe and sound. I am also sending my heartfelt thoughts and prayers to the families that are grieving for their loved ones that were lost today in this tragedy.
Friday, November 16, 2007
November 16
This has gotten out of hand I say.
When you cannot wear your very favorite thing in the whole wide world (your KU hoodie), things have gone too far.
Now, when you're pregnant you expect this sort of thing. But, when you can't wear a F*&%^$! pullover hoodie because your boobs are too effin' huge, that's where I draw the line. Mind you, I drew this line 3 times already just to have the line disappear into gargantuan boob world.
I weighed myself today and was shocked, yeah I know my stomach has gotten to the point that I almost shut it in the truck door if I'm not careful, but yet I can still wear all my pants. Hell until last week I was wearing a pair of jeans I bought in June. The boobage is where the problemage is.
Back to the scale thing, after throwing up twice yesterday I gained 9 pounds. How that is possible I can't say. What I can say is that when I woke up my chin had friends hanging out with it. And, I do believe that my boobs have grown so much that there is nowhere to go but up ..............so now I have chin tits.
I've resigned myself to that fact that I won't be leaving the house until at least April, I don't know how I can face the world when it's cold outside and my chin starts to get hard nipples.
This has gotten out of hand I say.
When you cannot wear your very favorite thing in the whole wide world (your KU hoodie), things have gone too far.
Now, when you're pregnant you expect this sort of thing. But, when you can't wear a F*&%^$! pullover hoodie because your boobs are too effin' huge, that's where I draw the line. Mind you, I drew this line 3 times already just to have the line disappear into gargantuan boob world.
I weighed myself today and was shocked, yeah I know my stomach has gotten to the point that I almost shut it in the truck door if I'm not careful, but yet I can still wear all my pants. Hell until last week I was wearing a pair of jeans I bought in June. The boobage is where the problemage is.
Back to the scale thing, after throwing up twice yesterday I gained 9 pounds. How that is possible I can't say. What I can say is that when I woke up my chin had friends hanging out with it. And, I do believe that my boobs have grown so much that there is nowhere to go but up ..............so now I have chin tits.
I've resigned myself to that fact that I won't be leaving the house until at least April, I don't know how I can face the world when it's cold outside and my chin starts to get hard nipples.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
November 14
The Name Game
Well ! Since I have gotten such a response out of that little tidbit of how we are questioning names we might as well get this started and name the boy !
I have almost decided to give him a Chinese name, considering that no matter how much I eat or what time it is I am always hungry an hour later. *Snort*
The "S" thing. No, unlike the girls the boy will not have an "S" name. It wasn't really our plan from the beginning to name them all with that letter, but we happened to like the names and by the time #5 was on her way it seemed almost wrong not to, and oddly enough they fit into the "mold" that their names are.
We did consider an "S" name for him but the few that we liked were all associated with a boy that is a weirdo, or terribly mean, ya know...you just can't name him that knowing those kinds of things go with a name. You're just going to have trust me on that one, mkay ?
So far a few of the names we are considering :
Ashton
Asher
Brody
Caden
Jackson (which is our original name that we have had for 10 years, very popular now)
Didda's is sure that since it is a boy wee should name him Spongebob, or Diego, and somehow linked the name Coffee with a boy, but unfortunately I don't think we'll be going with any of those.
Oh and if you'd like you can go here to the Social Security Website to see just how popular some of your favorite names are !
So let's hear the names !
The Name Game
Well ! Since I have gotten such a response out of that little tidbit of how we are questioning names we might as well get this started and name the boy !
I have almost decided to give him a Chinese name, considering that no matter how much I eat or what time it is I am always hungry an hour later. *Snort*
The "S" thing. No, unlike the girls the boy will not have an "S" name. It wasn't really our plan from the beginning to name them all with that letter, but we happened to like the names and by the time #5 was on her way it seemed almost wrong not to, and oddly enough they fit into the "mold" that their names are.
We did consider an "S" name for him but the few that we liked were all associated with a boy that is a weirdo, or terribly mean, ya know...you just can't name him that knowing those kinds of things go with a name. You're just going to have trust me on that one, mkay ?
So far a few of the names we are considering :
Ashton
Asher
Brody
Caden
Jackson (which is our original name that we have had for 10 years, very popular now)
Didda's is sure that since it is a boy wee should name him Spongebob, or Diego, and somehow linked the name Coffee with a boy, but unfortunately I don't think we'll be going with any of those.
Oh and if you'd like you can go here to the Social Security Website to see just how popular some of your favorite names are !
So let's hear the names !
Monday, November 12, 2007
November 12
Monday
This weekend was quite uneventful. We shampooed carpets, I worked, we did yard work. Oh I did finally get the hose out and rinse off all the chalk paint monster footprints on the driveway from Halloween. And there you have it. I did get a new keyboard and mouse the other day due to MiMi grabbing a full soda and pouring it on the old ones. These are both wireless, and while they are cool and the keyboard can type even when you take it to the living room (Jam had to check on this)....I hate the keyboard. It's very much like a laptop keyboard, the keys are all flush and weird, and for some reason the "E" key either ignores me completely or tries to compensate the next time I hit it by putting up 3 god damn E's. Ugh. It makes transcription take much longer than it should.
I'm trying to make a list of what to get people for Christmas, not Didda though because after 15 minutes of Nickoloden commercials she has a wish list that amounts to about 5 grand, so her gifts should be easy. She sat up in bed the other night, eyes closed, pointed toward the wall and said "Mom ! I want that for Christmas !"
Let's see.....in other news we are trying to decide on a name for the male fetus. Since it is a boy and we used to have a named picked out that is now way overused we are lost. We like a few names, but still, can't decide.
Alrighty well, I am off ! Oh and I don't want to forget to say Happy Veteran's Day, to all of you !
We Love Our Troops, Past, Present and Future !! Thank You !
Monday
This weekend was quite uneventful. We shampooed carpets, I worked, we did yard work. Oh I did finally get the hose out and rinse off all the chalk paint monster footprints on the driveway from Halloween. And there you have it. I did get a new keyboard and mouse the other day due to MiMi grabbing a full soda and pouring it on the old ones. These are both wireless, and while they are cool and the keyboard can type even when you take it to the living room (Jam had to check on this)....I hate the keyboard. It's very much like a laptop keyboard, the keys are all flush and weird, and for some reason the "E" key either ignores me completely or tries to compensate the next time I hit it by putting up 3 god damn E's. Ugh. It makes transcription take much longer than it should.
I'm trying to make a list of what to get people for Christmas, not Didda though because after 15 minutes of Nickoloden commercials she has a wish list that amounts to about 5 grand, so her gifts should be easy. She sat up in bed the other night, eyes closed, pointed toward the wall and said "Mom ! I want that for Christmas !"
Let's see.....in other news we are trying to decide on a name for the male fetus. Since it is a boy and we used to have a named picked out that is now way overused we are lost. We like a few names, but still, can't decide.
Alrighty well, I am off ! Oh and I don't want to forget to say Happy Veteran's Day, to all of you !
We Love Our Troops, Past, Present and Future !! Thank You !
Thursday, November 08, 2007
November 08
Thursday or..."Friday Eve" as AuntieM says
I finally slept really well for 2 hours ! Mind you it was from 5 until 7 a.m. but hey , I am taking what I can get right now. I am in a crazy mind state right now. I mean I literally cannot shut my brain off all fucking night.
" Remember to pay this on this day....Oh I wonder how much is left in the kids lunch account ? ......I think the darker carpet would be better, I hope they still have that remnant at the carpet place.......damn we need carpet pad too.....It's 1:27 I can sleep until 3 when MiMi wakes up.....Damn I forgot call call and pay the insurance, what day did it say is expired ?.......I hope hubs drives careful tomorrow just in case......Did he take the trash out or not ?.....What the hell was that sound, hmmm JayDawg didn't move so it must be nothing, oh wait there it is again....shit what if it's a robber .....wait...what if they are stealing my truck ...dammit my cd's are in there....and the carseats.......guess I'll go peek. Sigh...it's 2:49 MiMi will wake up in a few so I might as well turn the t.v. back on ......................."
My doctor says I can take something for it but damn I'm not going to do it all the time, this baby will be so sleep drugged up that he'll be asleep until he's 7 if I do.
It's skate party night for the school tonight, so around 7 please bow your head and say a little prayer for me. Or, you can just take a shot of whatever alcohol you're closest to, whatever.
Jam's teacher will be there tonight and I know I haven't filled you all in on that situation. The last time we went to Kansas, her teacher made the remark to her that "you kids at this school just leave for weeks at a time on a whim and it is not acceptable for your education." Then she didn't give us all of her work before we left like we requested and proceeded to make Jam stay in for two recess's and send home notes saying it was not in on time after we got back. Last week after we got back Jam said out loud that her head was killing her and the teacher said " well you cannot go home because you absolutely cannot miss more school."
Hehehe. Really ? She can't ? Wanna bet ? First of all I will be damned if anyone attempts to dictate how many days of school my kids miss. I mean really I apologize about the fact that people in our family get chronically ill or die during the school year and if I could stop it I would, but I can't, so fucking deal. And, if you get off on saying shit like that to a 5th grader then you need to grow some balls and say it to her Momma. Intimidation is your tactic ? On a child ? If you like it so much then you'll love what I have in store for ya !
We've already had one chat about this, and if you tell my kid again that even if she is sick she can't leave....you'll wish you would have shut your mouth because you won't be able to shut it right for a while. Oh and then just for shits and giggles I'm gonna smack you with this Algebra for 9th graders you have her doing too. K, thanks, bye.
Thursday or..."Friday Eve" as AuntieM says
I finally slept really well for 2 hours ! Mind you it was from 5 until 7 a.m. but hey , I am taking what I can get right now. I am in a crazy mind state right now. I mean I literally cannot shut my brain off all fucking night.
" Remember to pay this on this day....Oh I wonder how much is left in the kids lunch account ? ......I think the darker carpet would be better, I hope they still have that remnant at the carpet place.......damn we need carpet pad too.....It's 1:27 I can sleep until 3 when MiMi wakes up.....Damn I forgot call call and pay the insurance, what day did it say is expired ?.......I hope hubs drives careful tomorrow just in case......Did he take the trash out or not ?.....What the hell was that sound, hmmm JayDawg didn't move so it must be nothing, oh wait there it is again....shit what if it's a robber .....wait...what if they are stealing my truck ...dammit my cd's are in there....and the carseats.......guess I'll go peek. Sigh...it's 2:49 MiMi will wake up in a few so I might as well turn the t.v. back on ......................."
My doctor says I can take something for it but damn I'm not going to do it all the time, this baby will be so sleep drugged up that he'll be asleep until he's 7 if I do.
It's skate party night for the school tonight, so around 7 please bow your head and say a little prayer for me. Or, you can just take a shot of whatever alcohol you're closest to, whatever.
Jam's teacher will be there tonight and I know I haven't filled you all in on that situation. The last time we went to Kansas, her teacher made the remark to her that "you kids at this school just leave for weeks at a time on a whim and it is not acceptable for your education." Then she didn't give us all of her work before we left like we requested and proceeded to make Jam stay in for two recess's and send home notes saying it was not in on time after we got back. Last week after we got back Jam said out loud that her head was killing her and the teacher said " well you cannot go home because you absolutely cannot miss more school."
Hehehe. Really ? She can't ? Wanna bet ? First of all I will be damned if anyone attempts to dictate how many days of school my kids miss. I mean really I apologize about the fact that people in our family get chronically ill or die during the school year and if I could stop it I would, but I can't, so fucking deal. And, if you get off on saying shit like that to a 5th grader then you need to grow some balls and say it to her Momma. Intimidation is your tactic ? On a child ? If you like it so much then you'll love what I have in store for ya !
We've already had one chat about this, and if you tell my kid again that even if she is sick she can't leave....you'll wish you would have shut your mouth because you won't be able to shut it right for a while. Oh and then just for shits and giggles I'm gonna smack you with this Algebra for 9th graders you have her doing too. K, thanks, bye.
Wednesday, November 07, 2007
Shazam !
I'm here I swear ! Jane ....see ? I'm here dammit !
Ok so, I have tons to say and nothing to say all at the same time. Nice...yeah I know. time to say a few and then I gotta come back tomorrow to chat and visit y'all.
The pics. The mummy, I made him...no Bob it's not hubs, he's not holding a golf club , a remote or a beer so that's how I tell the difference.
Uhm there is other shit I made too but I can't remember it all right now. My focus now is Christmas. Besides our own decorations Hubs just asked me a "favor" for his store deco's. I am such a sucker.
In other news....my mom's former boyfriend who is a habitual law breaker, constant drunk, convicted felon...blah blah blah. Anyway karma found his ass and but good I tell you ! that son of a bitch was so drunk that when he leaned on the porch railing that gave way he fell. Not just a fall mind you. He fell on his face and broke his back in two separate places. And, busted his face and teeth up. Ok. How drunk do you have to be to fall face first off of a porch and make NO attempt to brace yourself or even protect your face ?!?! I mean really !?!?!? If you happen to know the answer to that , it was a rhetorical question and I don't really want to know the answer. I know it sounds mean that I'm telling all about this. I have never wished physical harm on a person.....ever. Although, I've thought about it but didn't for fear something might happen. Anyway I am just saying that when a person such as this scum gets something near what he deserves I'll be damned if I don't smile a tiny bit.
Now, what else ....hhmmmm. Oh. I got my feelings hurt today . Oh hush, I know that sounds stupid but I did, and for whatever reason I didn't do my normal thing of coming back spewing poison to the person who did it, even though I could have VERY easily. I didn't. Not because I am above that sort of thing, but because I would have started crying while I was yelling. I am SUCH a girl. Blerf.
Oh and yes Proto....I know I'm a total slacker on updating here ! :p
I'm here I swear ! Jane ....see ? I'm here dammit !
Ok so, I have tons to say and nothing to say all at the same time. Nice...yeah I know. time to say a few and then I gotta come back tomorrow to chat and visit y'all.
The pics. The mummy, I made him...no Bob it's not hubs, he's not holding a golf club , a remote or a beer so that's how I tell the difference.
Uhm there is other shit I made too but I can't remember it all right now. My focus now is Christmas. Besides our own decorations Hubs just asked me a "favor" for his store deco's. I am such a sucker.
In other news....my mom's former boyfriend who is a habitual law breaker, constant drunk, convicted felon...blah blah blah. Anyway karma found his ass and but good I tell you ! that son of a bitch was so drunk that when he leaned on the porch railing that gave way he fell. Not just a fall mind you. He fell on his face and broke his back in two separate places. And, busted his face and teeth up. Ok. How drunk do you have to be to fall face first off of a porch and make NO attempt to brace yourself or even protect your face ?!?! I mean really !?!?!? If you happen to know the answer to that , it was a rhetorical question and I don't really want to know the answer. I know it sounds mean that I'm telling all about this. I have never wished physical harm on a person.....ever. Although, I've thought about it but didn't for fear something might happen. Anyway I am just saying that when a person such as this scum gets something near what he deserves I'll be damned if I don't smile a tiny bit.
Now, what else ....hhmmmm. Oh. I got my feelings hurt today . Oh hush, I know that sounds stupid but I did, and for whatever reason I didn't do my normal thing of coming back spewing poison to the person who did it, even though I could have VERY easily. I didn't. Not because I am above that sort of thing, but because I would have started crying while I was yelling. I am SUCH a girl. Blerf.
Oh and yes Proto....I know I'm a total slacker on updating here ! :p
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
September 19
Mmmm s'ghetti
We sat outside in the fall night air. Our neighbor came over and we all chatted for a bit. I mentioned that we'd heard his dog barking a few nights ago. No...I'm not the kind of person who bitches abut dogs barking. I mentioned it because out of the 3 years we've lived here we have heard this dog (Lexus a German Shepherd) bark maybe 3 times. (I didn't even believe they had a dog until we saw her through the open gate two years ago.)
Saying that sparked his memory and he told us why she was barking.
He went out early Saturday morning because his wife had said that Lexus was howling all night, and she was worried about her. He called to her and she never came around. He finally found her on the side of the house, struggling to walk. He said it was like her back end was paralyzed.
She whined when she saw him and laid back down. After he got over to her and got one of the outside light on he tried to examine her. She still couldn't stand so he put his hands on her haunches to try and help her. It was then he saw the problem. He grabbed her long fur and lifted it up and away from her skin. First he saw blood, then he saw maggots. Thousands of maggots. They took her to the vet and 1400.00, a complete shave down, approximately 1200 maggots, and 9 stitches later....she is home. Bald but, less any fly larva.
She'd gotten a cut from the kennel a few days earlier, and they didn't see the need to treat it I guess. The flies were quite happy about this lapse in judgement by the dog's owners and even happier that their new eggs would not only have a place to sleep but a place to eat as well. I guess what they say is true huh ? German shepherd meat is good eats ?
Ha. Yeah I know that's sick....but some days life is so.....just so that there is nothing to do but to tell the story of your neighbors dog and the maggots.
Mmmm s'ghetti
We sat outside in the fall night air. Our neighbor came over and we all chatted for a bit. I mentioned that we'd heard his dog barking a few nights ago. No...I'm not the kind of person who bitches abut dogs barking. I mentioned it because out of the 3 years we've lived here we have heard this dog (Lexus a German Shepherd) bark maybe 3 times. (I didn't even believe they had a dog until we saw her through the open gate two years ago.)
Saying that sparked his memory and he told us why she was barking.
He went out early Saturday morning because his wife had said that Lexus was howling all night, and she was worried about her. He called to her and she never came around. He finally found her on the side of the house, struggling to walk. He said it was like her back end was paralyzed.
She whined when she saw him and laid back down. After he got over to her and got one of the outside light on he tried to examine her. She still couldn't stand so he put his hands on her haunches to try and help her. It was then he saw the problem. He grabbed her long fur and lifted it up and away from her skin. First he saw blood, then he saw maggots. Thousands of maggots. They took her to the vet and 1400.00, a complete shave down, approximately 1200 maggots, and 9 stitches later....she is home. Bald but, less any fly larva.
She'd gotten a cut from the kennel a few days earlier, and they didn't see the need to treat it I guess. The flies were quite happy about this lapse in judgement by the dog's owners and even happier that their new eggs would not only have a place to sleep but a place to eat as well. I guess what they say is true huh ? German shepherd meat is good eats ?
Ha. Yeah I know that's sick....but some days life is so.....just so that there is nothing to do but to tell the story of your neighbors dog and the maggots.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
September 17
Let's dance the jig(saw)
I damn sure did ! I've been wanting one for some time now, and my good friend Mel happened upon two in a box of shit she bought at an auction last weekend. Meaning I inherited a saw !
So we all know what that means. Jess is gonna saw on some shit ! I am totally clueless as to what I'll be making with this contraption of mine, although I do think I'll start with something Halloween. I should say I'm going to try and start with something Halloween. But, considering the only power tool I've ever used is a rechargeable screwdriver, then it may turn out that I'm making nothing but a lopsided pumpkin, and a fingerless hand, the hand being mine.
Our AFLAC pays you like 5 grand if you cut your pinky finger off, and I'm quite sure I can function for the rest of my life without a pinky finger. (Just one of those things you look up to see how much it pays out of curiosity) So...here's to making Halloween decorations and coming out with just one less finger.
Now that I've said that I probably jinxed myself and my typing will be all fucked up because I jigsawed my pinky finger off. Wait, I don't think I'll be able to talk right either considering I talk with my hands so much. Not sign language, but more like " it was this big...and...that sonofabitch went clear over there!"
Shit. I'll be a bad typist and a mute.
Ok now I have to re-think this whole jigsaw plan and go to bed. My stomach is crazy too. We had breakfast burritos for dinner and my gut keeps making a toilet flushing sound.
Let's dance the jig(saw)
I damn sure did ! I've been wanting one for some time now, and my good friend Mel happened upon two in a box of shit she bought at an auction last weekend. Meaning I inherited a saw !
So we all know what that means. Jess is gonna saw on some shit ! I am totally clueless as to what I'll be making with this contraption of mine, although I do think I'll start with something Halloween. I should say I'm going to try and start with something Halloween. But, considering the only power tool I've ever used is a rechargeable screwdriver, then it may turn out that I'm making nothing but a lopsided pumpkin, and a fingerless hand, the hand being mine.
Our AFLAC pays you like 5 grand if you cut your pinky finger off, and I'm quite sure I can function for the rest of my life without a pinky finger. (Just one of those things you look up to see how much it pays out of curiosity) So...here's to making Halloween decorations and coming out with just one less finger.
Now that I've said that I probably jinxed myself and my typing will be all fucked up because I jigsawed my pinky finger off. Wait, I don't think I'll be able to talk right either considering I talk with my hands so much. Not sign language, but more like " it was this big...and...that sonofabitch went clear over there!"
Shit. I'll be a bad typist and a mute.
Ok now I have to re-think this whole jigsaw plan and go to bed. My stomach is crazy too. We had breakfast burritos for dinner and my gut keeps making a toilet flushing sound.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Yesterday was great ! We left a bit early so we could sit in on two other panels before mine. Hubs was sure it'd be boring and over his head and not his thing. But, he too had a good time !
The panel before mine was "How to Cultivate a Cult Following", and that is where I saw Aaron Raz who is the co-author of "What Becomes You", a book that I cannot wait to read. The other author of the book is Aaron's mom, which after you read the summary of the book might be surprising to many people. Anyway, I watched him speak, and I kind of love him, and although he has no idea he is my new BFF, like the kind that is your BFF but just doesn't know it, and might think it's sort of stalker-ish. But hey, stalker is nice compared to what else I've been called this week.
Also on that same panel was Amy Guth, author of "Three Fallen Women". Amy is a total smartass, and funny as hell. I love her too.
Oh and lest I not forget , Jami Attenberg, who besides writing a fanfuckingtastic book called "Instant Love" last year has a new book coming out "The Kept Man" , she read from that yesterday during our panel together and it's another I can't wait to read.
The moderator of my panel, "The Devil in Miss Jones" was Lauren Cerand who had never been to the Midwest, and thought everyone here was over the top nice. Which I found odd and I think maybe she just ran into people that weren't really from here, or they were high. Or, maybe both.
Oh ! I also met Daniel Curtis, the he started the Nebraska Arts Preserve, which hasn't been updated in ohhhh I dunno a LONG time, but regardless he is the first one who talked about me (nicely) and started the ball rolling for me to get where I am today. Yep right here still blogging. Thanks Daniel !
At the end of our panel, Lauren asked about one of the most risque, or secretive things I've written, something that got attention that was , well odd.
The story I told was about the entry below......
Friday, July 28, 2006
Is it a guy thing ?
Ok when hubs doesn't get his "rocks" off within a certain period time...say 4 days. He starts doing this thing at night. Half the time he's quite aware of it, and the other half, I think his wanker just does it's own thing.
Well...beings that yesterday was "4th Day"...that means two things...one...he's a fucking horndog, and two I will fear getting raped in my sleep all night.
So to head off this issue I tried something new. And, surrounded myself with pillows.
So when I start to wake for my 3:14 a.m. pee break...I hear him..he and someone/thing are gettin' it on like donkey kong.
He had the wrap around going and everything..on my poor innocent perky cotton pillow.
"Honey..uhm...wake up"....
"Ahem...*cough* honey ?"
"Dammit man ! Wake up ! You're dry humping a pillow !"
Yet after waking up ...he denies that he was trying to cross breed with a cotton/poly fill...some thing's are just too hard to deny..but hey I won't tell anyone.
I can't imagine trying to do that ...but then again, I'm pretty good at telling the difference between a wanker..and a pillow...
Now that I think about it, the reality that he couldn't tell the difference between a pillow and my ass...says a lot about the state of my ass right now.
Now, I don't normally make it a habit to talk about comments or emails I get about entries. They are a little secret, the emails especially. But for whatever reason this entry made someone mad. (Not hubs who didn't know I wrote this until yesterday ...just so happens he was in thr front row as I retold the story).
Okay the person it upset, I have no idea who it was, they sent me numerous emails about it. Some saying how wrong I was for telling the world about that, and then some saying that it's my own fault for not giving my husband enough sex.
*One would think that the person sending these was hubs but it wasn't I'd get them when he was upstairs or in meetings.*
I never understood why it made whoever so damn mad, or how in the hell it was their business that I told anyone and that I didn't want to have sex. But dam, saying it's my own fault for not giving it up enough, yeah hi 5 kids you asshole get a clue.
So, I thought about that a lot on the way home, and I doubt that it is anywhere close to the most risque thing I've written, but since hubs was there it only seemed fitting that I have a story about him having sex with inanimate objects.
The panel before mine was "How to Cultivate a Cult Following", and that is where I saw Aaron Raz who is the co-author of "What Becomes You", a book that I cannot wait to read. The other author of the book is Aaron's mom, which after you read the summary of the book might be surprising to many people. Anyway, I watched him speak, and I kind of love him, and although he has no idea he is my new BFF, like the kind that is your BFF but just doesn't know it, and might think it's sort of stalker-ish. But hey, stalker is nice compared to what else I've been called this week.
Also on that same panel was Amy Guth, author of "Three Fallen Women". Amy is a total smartass, and funny as hell. I love her too.
Oh and lest I not forget , Jami Attenberg, who besides writing a fanfuckingtastic book called "Instant Love" last year has a new book coming out "The Kept Man" , she read from that yesterday during our panel together and it's another I can't wait to read.
The moderator of my panel, "The Devil in Miss Jones" was Lauren Cerand who had never been to the Midwest, and thought everyone here was over the top nice. Which I found odd and I think maybe she just ran into people that weren't really from here, or they were high. Or, maybe both.
Oh ! I also met Daniel Curtis, the he started the Nebraska Arts Preserve, which hasn't been updated in ohhhh I dunno a LONG time, but regardless he is the first one who talked about me (nicely) and started the ball rolling for me to get where I am today. Yep right here still blogging. Thanks Daniel !
At the end of our panel, Lauren asked about one of the most risque, or secretive things I've written, something that got attention that was , well odd.
The story I told was about the entry below......
Friday, July 28, 2006
Is it a guy thing ?
Ok when hubs doesn't get his "rocks" off within a certain period time...say 4 days. He starts doing this thing at night. Half the time he's quite aware of it, and the other half, I think his wanker just does it's own thing.
Well...beings that yesterday was "4th Day"...that means two things...one...he's a fucking horndog, and two I will fear getting raped in my sleep all night.
So to head off this issue I tried something new. And, surrounded myself with pillows.
So when I start to wake for my 3:14 a.m. pee break...I hear him..he and someone/thing are gettin' it on like donkey kong.
He had the wrap around going and everything..on my poor innocent perky cotton pillow.
"Honey..uhm...wake up"....
"Ahem...*cough* honey ?"
"Dammit man ! Wake up ! You're dry humping a pillow !"
Yet after waking up ...he denies that he was trying to cross breed with a cotton/poly fill...some thing's are just too hard to deny..but hey I won't tell anyone.
I can't imagine trying to do that ...but then again, I'm pretty good at telling the difference between a wanker..and a pillow...
Now that I think about it, the reality that he couldn't tell the difference between a pillow and my ass...says a lot about the state of my ass right now.
Now, I don't normally make it a habit to talk about comments or emails I get about entries. They are a little secret, the emails especially. But for whatever reason this entry made someone mad. (Not hubs who didn't know I wrote this until yesterday ...just so happens he was in thr front row as I retold the story).
Okay the person it upset, I have no idea who it was, they sent me numerous emails about it. Some saying how wrong I was for telling the world about that, and then some saying that it's my own fault for not giving my husband enough sex.
*One would think that the person sending these was hubs but it wasn't I'd get them when he was upstairs or in meetings.*
I never understood why it made whoever so damn mad, or how in the hell it was their business that I told anyone and that I didn't want to have sex. But dam, saying it's my own fault for not giving it up enough, yeah hi 5 kids you asshole get a clue.
So, I thought about that a lot on the way home, and I doubt that it is anywhere close to the most risque thing I've written, but since hubs was there it only seemed fitting that I have a story about him having sex with inanimate objects.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
September 13
Mum is the word
Because I planted some is why. My "lamp" guy at Lowe's handed me, and Mel, some prices on mums that a girl can't refuse. So mums, I got.
Mums are my favorite. Mums are pretty. Mums bloom in all their glory when all the other flowers are getting tired and ready to leave the party.
Now see when I said "mum is the word" I meant ...the word to say as many times as I could, just because I can.
Mum.
Diddas did help me. She wanted to pick all the blooms right off and keep them in her purse (sidenote: if you lose anything at my house check Didda's purse) but I talked her into taking only one bloom and helping me plant to rest so they'd grow big and pretty. As soon as we'd get one planted she'd clap her hands, stomp her foot, and demand to the plants that they grow. As in, like right then.
We had a luncheon today for the 5th grade moms. it was a "who's who of the school." Ha not really, it turned out to be more of a who's who's mom get together. It is one of those things you think you'll never get caught up in. Well maybe you knew you'd get caught up in it. Me ? No way man. It's amazing to me how I can sit here and say that I'm not one of them, and then be one in the same breath.
I don't try to be or want to be. But, I think that makes me a "desirable" candidate to "them". Like I said I didn't want to get all caught up in it, but ten minutes into there I am talking about if my daughter marries her son then our grandkids would be beautiful, and they would not get married until after college but before medical school. They'd have to live close of course, and we both know we'd be the "best" Grandma.
Son of a bitch.
I lunch with the ladies and this is what happens. I walk in like I don't give a shit. I walk out having arranged a marriage for my 10-year-old, and a lunch date at the country club on Thursday.
Mum is the word
Because I planted some is why. My "lamp" guy at Lowe's handed me, and Mel, some prices on mums that a girl can't refuse. So mums, I got.
Mums are my favorite. Mums are pretty. Mums bloom in all their glory when all the other flowers are getting tired and ready to leave the party.
Now see when I said "mum is the word" I meant ...the word to say as many times as I could, just because I can.
Mum.
Diddas did help me. She wanted to pick all the blooms right off and keep them in her purse (sidenote: if you lose anything at my house check Didda's purse) but I talked her into taking only one bloom and helping me plant to rest so they'd grow big and pretty. As soon as we'd get one planted she'd clap her hands, stomp her foot, and demand to the plants that they grow. As in, like right then.
We had a luncheon today for the 5th grade moms. it was a "who's who of the school." Ha not really, it turned out to be more of a who's who's mom get together. It is one of those things you think you'll never get caught up in. Well maybe you knew you'd get caught up in it. Me ? No way man. It's amazing to me how I can sit here and say that I'm not one of them, and then be one in the same breath.
I don't try to be or want to be. But, I think that makes me a "desirable" candidate to "them". Like I said I didn't want to get all caught up in it, but ten minutes into there I am talking about if my daughter marries her son then our grandkids would be beautiful, and they would not get married until after college but before medical school. They'd have to live close of course, and we both know we'd be the "best" Grandma.
Son of a bitch.
I lunch with the ladies and this is what happens. I walk in like I don't give a shit. I walk out having arranged a marriage for my 10-year-old, and a lunch date at the country club on Thursday.
Monday, September 10, 2007
September 10
Let's Play Dress Up !
Ok after getting emails, and ideas on comments from people on what I should wear to the LitFest....I thought it might be a fun little game to play !
So, your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to find me the perfect outfit !!
#1. An outfit that I would wear, as in you think it suits me personality wise, etc.
and
#2. An off the wall, funny, or just flat out terrible ensemble !
Now, #1 and #2 cannot be the same so don't go thinking you are smart and say I'd really wear one of the #2 choices.
Email me the pics at : samvanso2129@msn.com, then I'll post them with your name in the photo album.
Ok ! You have until midnight Tuesday, go !
Let's Play Dress Up !
Ok after getting emails, and ideas on comments from people on what I should wear to the LitFest....I thought it might be a fun little game to play !
So, your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to find me the perfect outfit !!
#1. An outfit that I would wear, as in you think it suits me personality wise, etc.
and
#2. An off the wall, funny, or just flat out terrible ensemble !
Now, #1 and #2 cannot be the same so don't go thinking you are smart and say I'd really wear one of the #2 choices.
Email me the pics at : samvanso2129@msn.com, then I'll post them with your name in the photo album.
Ok ! You have until midnight Tuesday, go !
Sunday, September 09, 2007
September 09
Nice
I got an email from Timothy Schaffert saying that "the panelists were more than welcome to bring postcards, buttons, magnets, and any other promotional materials for your books and/or related projects."
Nice. I of course just canceled the blimp appearance with the saying "Who's Your Momma ?!" for fear that it would be too much, now he says I can bring shit !?!?
I think he threw in "related projects" because I am the only one there without a book or nine. I mean hey I'd write a book, but damn have you seen books ? They're like huge ! And all those pages. I dunno about that.
And, I have tons of buttons laying around but I mean who wants all my extra shirt buttons ? I don't get it.
Of course I have no idea once again what the hell I'm going to wear. You know how you want to appear "well dressed, smart, pretty, and approachable" when you do a thing like this. No outfit I have says all those things at once. And, yes I already tried all my outfits on together to see if it worked and it just looked like I had 13 outfits on.
Ok well hubs is home so that means I have to do the whole "wife" thing and "make him some dinner", but he also just volunteered to hold up giant signs with my blog address during my panel, oh wait, he just volunteered to streak naked and do the Arsenio Hall woot too. I just informed him that if he does I'll be introducing him as my ex-husband.
Nice
I got an email from Timothy Schaffert saying that "the panelists were more than welcome to bring postcards, buttons, magnets, and any other promotional materials for your books and/or related projects."
Nice. I of course just canceled the blimp appearance with the saying "Who's Your Momma ?!" for fear that it would be too much, now he says I can bring shit !?!?
I think he threw in "related projects" because I am the only one there without a book or nine. I mean hey I'd write a book, but damn have you seen books ? They're like huge ! And all those pages. I dunno about that.
And, I have tons of buttons laying around but I mean who wants all my extra shirt buttons ? I don't get it.
Of course I have no idea once again what the hell I'm going to wear. You know how you want to appear "well dressed, smart, pretty, and approachable" when you do a thing like this. No outfit I have says all those things at once. And, yes I already tried all my outfits on together to see if it worked and it just looked like I had 13 outfits on.
Ok well hubs is home so that means I have to do the whole "wife" thing and "make him some dinner", but he also just volunteered to hold up giant signs with my blog address during my panel, oh wait, he just volunteered to streak naked and do the Arsenio Hall woot too. I just informed him that if he does I'll be introducing him as my ex-husband.
Friday, September 07, 2007
September 04
Continued from "The Hoaster Coaster"
Hubs stayed with the older 3 while they did bumper cars and I took Didda over to drive cars that were her size. Walking...I mean waddling and blubbering...in front of me , two ladies , one pushing a stroller inside the stroller was a 4 year old child fat as her mom, drinking a (I kid you not) a baby bottle full of pepsi and eating a damned funnel cake.
Let me say that when I call a child fat, I mean fat, not chubba wubba baby fat, I mean the kid is in adult diapers at 1 year and has legs so fat that their little baby legs rub together and threaten to start a fire.
I start to sort of snicker for no reason really, well besides the obvious, when the one pushing the stroller looks off to the side.
I realize then that I recognize her. And, this my friends is no good recognization.
As my blood starts to boil, I think I'm handling myself quite well. Then Didda asks me why I'm trying to squeeze her fingers off and tells me it's not nice. Woopsy.
We take a small detour to avoid being behind them any longer and make our way to the little cars. Where, lo and behold, there she is again. Son. of. a. bitch. *Gritting teeth*
Breathe iiiinn. Breathe oooout.
(Only one word pops into my head right then. The "C" word. I don't even use that word, or like that word to be used. Which I believe is why it came up. It's something very very bad in my head and most people's, and she is #2 on the list of my "C" word people. Number one on that list is #1 for a damn good reason, and #2 is there because she helped #1).
This sucks.
I stand there wondering to myself if she knows that the only thing saving her from getting her ratty pimpled cellulite face ripped clean off is the fact that my 3 year old daughter is standing right here. For a split second, I pondered if it would really damage my little girl that much to see such a thing.
I wonder if she even sees me.
I wonder too if the cops would make it there before I was finished.
I suppose you are wondering who this woman is, and why I have such a serious, serious, problem with her. Uhm well, I can't tell ya.
Ha. I'm kidding. Of course I will tell you ! Just not today.
September 07
Paul Harvey says : And now...for the rest of the story
A long time ago in a land far way.......... (4 years ago and about 5 blocks over). I was pregnant. (Shocking I know), with Didda.
Hubs and I played volleyball weekly with a few people from his now former store, and had a great time. Well, beings that I was pregnant and unable to play anymore they had to find someone to take my spot. Little did I know at the time that the person that was chosen had intentions of taking my spot on the volleyball team, and more.
The woman was someone who I had never particularly liked per say, but I didn't hate her.
As soon as the volleyball started rumors began to fly around the store. She had told a few of the people I talked with daily some things that were, well, suspicious. She loved his eyes. She loved the way he could make people laugh. She loved that he was there alone every week.
This all on top of her saying in the same sentence that her and her husband were on the verge of a divorce.
I stayed mute on the subject to hubs for awhile, thinking that it was no big deal and really there is no denying how pretty his eyes really are. But, after weeks of this. I just couldn't take it any longer.
I calmly confronted my husband one night after he started talking about her and how she's having such a hard time, how she tells him everything, and asks him about everything in his life. He was dumbfounded that I could think such a horrible thing about her, that she was after my man. He said I was being silly, and dumb for listening to rumors.
Rumors that also included "C" word #2 from previously constantly saying "how cute they are together", and telling her to "go for it."
So then one night before volleyball. I decided that I'd tag along. Hubs on the other hand thought this was a bad idea, fearing that I would " make a scene." Ha. Making a scene was definitely part of the plan I tell ya. I didn't end up going, although he took the older two girls with him. I sat and waited patiently. And, I waited....not so patiently. An hour after it was time for them to be home, I was hot.
I just knew that they were all there together probably eating burgers and laughing. My two girl too, probably warming up to their soon to be step mommy.
I tried to call his phone and there was no answer.
They walked through the door soon after and I sent the girls to their rooms.
No words came out of my mouth at that point in time. Honestly I couldn't think straight.
Now I feel that I should tell you that when I am pregnant my body somehow taps into some strange super human strength capsule that I have hidden deep inside my uterus.
As hubs stood by the door still not even knowing what was going on. I picked up the lazy boy recliner, heaved it over my head and straight towards him, barely missing. Only barely because he stood there frozen not believing that a giant chair was sailing through the air at him, so it took him a second to respond.
After saying all the things I felt I needed to say. He acted like he hated me. He said he couldn't believe I couldn't trust him, and that he was only being a friend to her, and she would never do such a thing, and that she thought I was such a good person.
Weeks went by and only short snippets of conversation happened between him and I.
Then, one day, out of the clear blue. He came home from work, sat down across from me and said that it was now obvious that she wanted more than someone to talk to. She cried when he told her he could no longer be the friend she confided in, she said how much she hated me and how jealous she was of my life.
I never suspected that anything happened besides the talking really, I feared that it could. And, him not believing me and trusting what I was trying to tell him hurt more than anything. He did realize shit, finally, but just about when it was too late.
Soon after that store closed and there was a party at a local pub. I acted so excited to go and like my only reason for it was to say goodbye to the people who were being relocated. All the while, a relocation of someone else was on my mind.
Krissy's husband worked at that store too, he was one of the people who'd filled me in on other things.
Krissy and I , are a very good team when it comes to certain things. And, cornering a bitch in the bathroom is one of those things.
That my friends, is where the story that you hear ends. The rest of it, is all in here. <---Pointing at my head.
Continued from "The Hoaster Coaster"
Hubs stayed with the older 3 while they did bumper cars and I took Didda over to drive cars that were her size. Walking...I mean waddling and blubbering...in front of me , two ladies , one pushing a stroller inside the stroller was a 4 year old child fat as her mom, drinking a (I kid you not) a baby bottle full of pepsi and eating a damned funnel cake.
Let me say that when I call a child fat, I mean fat, not chubba wubba baby fat, I mean the kid is in adult diapers at 1 year and has legs so fat that their little baby legs rub together and threaten to start a fire.
I start to sort of snicker for no reason really, well besides the obvious, when the one pushing the stroller looks off to the side.
I realize then that I recognize her. And, this my friends is no good recognization.
As my blood starts to boil, I think I'm handling myself quite well. Then Didda asks me why I'm trying to squeeze her fingers off and tells me it's not nice. Woopsy.
We take a small detour to avoid being behind them any longer and make our way to the little cars. Where, lo and behold, there she is again. Son. of. a. bitch. *Gritting teeth*
Breathe iiiinn. Breathe oooout.
(Only one word pops into my head right then. The "C" word. I don't even use that word, or like that word to be used. Which I believe is why it came up. It's something very very bad in my head and most people's, and she is #2 on the list of my "C" word people. Number one on that list is #1 for a damn good reason, and #2 is there because she helped #1).
This sucks.
I stand there wondering to myself if she knows that the only thing saving her from getting her ratty pimpled cellulite face ripped clean off is the fact that my 3 year old daughter is standing right here. For a split second, I pondered if it would really damage my little girl that much to see such a thing.
I wonder if she even sees me.
I wonder too if the cops would make it there before I was finished.
I suppose you are wondering who this woman is, and why I have such a serious, serious, problem with her. Uhm well, I can't tell ya.
Ha. I'm kidding. Of course I will tell you ! Just not today.
September 07
Paul Harvey says : And now...for the rest of the story
A long time ago in a land far way.......... (4 years ago and about 5 blocks over). I was pregnant. (Shocking I know), with Didda.
Hubs and I played volleyball weekly with a few people from his now former store, and had a great time. Well, beings that I was pregnant and unable to play anymore they had to find someone to take my spot. Little did I know at the time that the person that was chosen had intentions of taking my spot on the volleyball team, and more.
The woman was someone who I had never particularly liked per say, but I didn't hate her.
As soon as the volleyball started rumors began to fly around the store. She had told a few of the people I talked with daily some things that were, well, suspicious. She loved his eyes. She loved the way he could make people laugh. She loved that he was there alone every week.
This all on top of her saying in the same sentence that her and her husband were on the verge of a divorce.
I stayed mute on the subject to hubs for awhile, thinking that it was no big deal and really there is no denying how pretty his eyes really are. But, after weeks of this. I just couldn't take it any longer.
I calmly confronted my husband one night after he started talking about her and how she's having such a hard time, how she tells him everything, and asks him about everything in his life. He was dumbfounded that I could think such a horrible thing about her, that she was after my man. He said I was being silly, and dumb for listening to rumors.
Rumors that also included "C" word #2 from previously constantly saying "how cute they are together", and telling her to "go for it."
So then one night before volleyball. I decided that I'd tag along. Hubs on the other hand thought this was a bad idea, fearing that I would " make a scene." Ha. Making a scene was definitely part of the plan I tell ya. I didn't end up going, although he took the older two girls with him. I sat and waited patiently. And, I waited....not so patiently. An hour after it was time for them to be home, I was hot.
I just knew that they were all there together probably eating burgers and laughing. My two girl too, probably warming up to their soon to be step mommy.
I tried to call his phone and there was no answer.
They walked through the door soon after and I sent the girls to their rooms.
No words came out of my mouth at that point in time. Honestly I couldn't think straight.
Now I feel that I should tell you that when I am pregnant my body somehow taps into some strange super human strength capsule that I have hidden deep inside my uterus.
As hubs stood by the door still not even knowing what was going on. I picked up the lazy boy recliner, heaved it over my head and straight towards him, barely missing. Only barely because he stood there frozen not believing that a giant chair was sailing through the air at him, so it took him a second to respond.
After saying all the things I felt I needed to say. He acted like he hated me. He said he couldn't believe I couldn't trust him, and that he was only being a friend to her, and she would never do such a thing, and that she thought I was such a good person.
Weeks went by and only short snippets of conversation happened between him and I.
Then, one day, out of the clear blue. He came home from work, sat down across from me and said that it was now obvious that she wanted more than someone to talk to. She cried when he told her he could no longer be the friend she confided in, she said how much she hated me and how jealous she was of my life.
I never suspected that anything happened besides the talking really, I feared that it could. And, him not believing me and trusting what I was trying to tell him hurt more than anything. He did realize shit, finally, but just about when it was too late.
Soon after that store closed and there was a party at a local pub. I acted so excited to go and like my only reason for it was to say goodbye to the people who were being relocated. All the while, a relocation of someone else was on my mind.
Krissy's husband worked at that store too, he was one of the people who'd filled me in on other things.
Krissy and I , are a very good team when it comes to certain things. And, cornering a bitch in the bathroom is one of those things.
That my friends, is where the story that you hear ends. The rest of it, is all in here. <---Pointing at my head.
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